Lucy Atkinson - Unexpected Concern
It's been two days since my last Cardiology appointment & I'm still thinking it over. I haven't discussed it with anyone, but it's been on my mind a lot. I was there for my regular check up and I was given the results of my last echo. The Doctor said it looked reassuring overall, but my aorta has stretched ever so slightly. I felt the panic rising within me and I started to sweat as I listened to his words. I must be hearing this wrong. My heart has to be OK. I had to gather myself back together quickly so I could take everything in. He was telling me the stretch to my aorta was very, very slight & was not a cause for concern right now, as long as I carry on being closely monitored. But I was not expecting this. I expected to be told my heart was perfect like all the other times, but this time was different & I was worried now.
I didn't know how to feel when I left the clinic. I was truly happy that the Doctor thought it was nothing to fret about at the moment, but I couldn't help feeling scared- scared that this might be the start of something. What if my aortic stretch worsens now that it's begun? What if it worsens rapidly? Thoughts of what this could mean for me in the future have been twirling around in my head. I can't confess my fears to anyone because it'll seem like I'm fussing over nothing. The news was more positive than negative & I understand how lucky I am, but I can't help feeling alarmed.